My Blog = My Life: biblical womanhood

Every once in a while you get really stretched as a blogger, and it's a good thing. Like this past week, for example, when a dear reader wrote me a letter that nearly broke my heart.

A homeschooling mother of six who loves the role God has given her, she finds herself between a rock and a hard place. Illness has left her husband unable to provide financially for his family and with unsupportive relatives and a church that scoffs at their decision to leave their fertility in the hands of the Lord, they are struggling not just to pay the bills, but to keep the mouths of their hungry children fed.

This dear mother shares the convictions I expressed in The Cost of Being A Stay-at-Home Mom and would love nothing more than to raise her children in the way she believes God calls her too. However, after waiting on the Lord for his direction, they see no other alternative than for her to work outside the home in order to provide basic necessities like food and clothing for their family.

Their desire is to live for Christ in every area of their lives; she wrote me wondering how the possibility of her being employed outside the home jives with Scripture.

A few questions that would help shape my answer include:

• How permanent is your husband's condition?
• Is your husband able to home school your children?
• Can you work from home (Proverbs 31)?
• Is there a church in the area that takes God's institution of the diaconate more seriously than the one you attend now?
• Is there any possibility of moving to a cheaper home, city, or state?
• How old are your children? Are they able to contribute at all to the family income or engage in a family business?
• You said you don't have any support from your relatives; is there a close friend or an older mentor who would be willing to help out with a loan (Leviticus 25:35-37)?
• It sounds like you've already cut every corner you can think of, but just in case, is there any way you can live on less? One vehicle instead of two? Sell unused toys and clothes on consignment? Hang your laundry on the line instead of using the dryer, etc.?

The story of Deborah in the book of Judges is one such example. Contrary to popular opinion, Deborah's leadership role as a prophetess is not an excuse or a reason for women of our day to do the same. There is no question she performed her job well or that God blessed it and ultimately used Deborah's actions to bring men back into leadership. But it was to Israel's great shame that God had to raise up a woman to support the men and warn them of their cowardice.
When God puts a godly person in a position where they are forced to act in a way that seemingly contradicts the rest of Scripture, someone else must always bear the punishment, guilt, fault, or shame (i.e. Hosea). In Deborah's case, it was the wimpy Israelite men of whom there was not found one with the courage to take the responsibility and lead.

In the case of the dear mother who wrote me earlier this week, I believe the shame lies with her unsupportive relatives and church. She is being forced outside of the home because her family and church have forsaken their biblical responsibilities (1 Timothy 5:8; 16; Leviticus 25:35-37; Proverbs 19:17; Psalm 112:5).

God instituted the diaconate so that the needs of the poor, of whom He said would always be with us (Mark 14:7), would be met. I never like suggesting that a family leave a church but if they are not cared for to such a degree that a mother of six children must leave her sacred responsibilities to keep her family from going hungry, it may be time to find a body of believers that recognize the importance of a mother's influence in the home and will joyfully make the sacrifices necessary so it can happen (James 1:27).

Unless her husband's condition improves and he is able once again to "bring home the bacon," or her church and family step up to the plate and in biblical love take care of those among them who are hurting, I believe this dear lady is not at all acting inappropriately in a situation that is less than ideal.

We serve a big God. Just as He was able to bless Deborah's efforts and restore Israel, so He can bless this mother, her husband, and children far above what we could even ask or think (Ephesians 3:20,21) during her temporary time of outside employment.

Linking to: Time-Warp Wife, Far Above Rubies, Raising Homemakers, Deep Roots At Home, Wise Woman, Raising Arrows, Raising Mighty Arrows, Hearts for Home, The Better Mom, A Mama's Story

Our 4-year-old daughter has no qualms about being feminine. She does her school in her princess dress, loves stories about princesses, hates wearing pants, wants to get married (to Daddy), diapers and clothes her stuffed dog multiple times a day, and believes green and blue are colors that should be reserved for boys.

Being girly is just so... so natural to girls (most of 'em)! Little girl, who aren't old enough to understand or conform to the most degrading and dehumanizing aspect of our culture: feminism.
I wish there was a way I could preserve my daughter's natural inclination to girly things. How can I raise her to be feminine in a feminist culture? A times, the challenge overwhelms me.
Society, at large, stifles biblical womanhood.. Girls get told it's a "waste of intelligence" to stay at home and raise children. Motherhood is a "mindless" routine that consists of changing diapers and being shackled to the stove. We know it's not a waste of time, but defending our decision seems like a losing battle. After all, there are a lot more of "them" than there are of "us."
In the end, it comes down to who gets to define the terms: neither you nor I. God alone, the Creator of women, wields that kind of authority, and He hasn't left it up to us to play the guessing game with our role or how we should act.

His Word is filled with meaning, instruction, and examples of mothers, wives, daughters, grandmothers, saints, sinners, lovers, nurturers, teachers, peacemakers, artists, and so much more. All we need to know about what makes for blessed society is right at our finger tips.

Still, we somehow believe our culture's vision for "liberating women" is better than the One who created women and came to set them free from their self-induced bondage.

Somehow we find ourselves in an identity crisis that our Bible-believing foremothers did not seem to have.

Somehow our "liberation" in the 21st century has bound us to a cubicle of tormenting doubts about what we are doing as women.
Somehow filing a stack of paperwork in an office is more important than sorting laundry.

Somehow drawing up a spreadsheet requires more creativity than artfully decorating your home.

Somehow teaching 30 kids to read takes more preparation than instructing three children how to live.

Somehow it requires sheer brilliance to manage employees in the corporate office while raising our children to be intelligent, honorable citizens is a demoted to a brainless job.

Somehow, if you get paid for doing one of the thousand jobs a mother does in a day, you can call yourself an expert.
We buckle under the pressure and bashfully admit, "Oh, I'm just a stay-at-home Mom."

We attempt to justify our choice by rambling on about all the other things we do with our "spare time" as though being a mother isn't a real job. "Well, I'm a chef, baker, time management expert, teacher, personal shopper, repairman, financial adviser, writer, etc."

It's time to stop apologizing.
Whether we find life as a woman to be stifling or liberating is ultimately our choice. The paradox of Scripture is that submission brings the greatest freedom and that death brings life. Only when we die to ourselves, our dreams, and our desires, will we find vitality and freedom in pursuing the high calling of biblical womanhood with joy, intelligence, and purpose.

If we get this, if our daughters get this, we can begin fostering femininity back into our feminist world.

The Wise Mom, The Praying Mom, The Single Mom, The Stepmom, The Working Mom, The Healthy Mom, The Work at Home Mom, The Modest Mom, The Stressed Mom, The Homeschooling Mom, The Special Needs Mom, The Mom Who Desires More Children, The Weary Mom...

The Pursuit of Motherhood 153 pages $7.99 $3.99

We Moms are a varied bunch, but we all have one thing in common: we have children to raise. Children, given to us from the hand of God, to raise for His honor and glory.
Motherhood can be overwhelming (for me, anyway). Our boys, how do we raise them to be real men in a world that confuses chivalry with chauvinism? And our daughters, is preparing them to be homemakers setting them up for disappointment?
Breast or bottle? What if you can't breastfeed? Cloth or disposables? Work from home, away from home, or not at all? Homeschool, private school, or public school? Birth control or Quiverfull?
So many questions. So many decisions. So little time; that's why we wrote The Pursuit of Motherhood.
The goal of The Pursuit of Motherhood is to sift through the sideline issues and encourage Moms in every situation to pursue mothering their children with all their heart, keeping God at the center of all their endeavors. "The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:3-5 (emphasis mine) The Pursuit of Motherhood is authored by 17 Moms including Kelly Crawford from Generation Cedar, June Fuentes from A Wise Woman, Jacqueline Franks from Deep Roots At Home, Melanie Young from Raising Real Men, and yours truly.
We share in common a love for the Lord and a love for our families, however imperfect. We sincerely desire the same for you and pray that this eBook will give you an uncommon vision for motherhood an the tools to restore its glory within your own home.

The Pursuit of Motherhood 153 pages $7.99 $3.99

Table of Contents

1. The Praying Mother
2. Mothering Through the Little Years
3. The Working Mom
4. The Healthy Mom
5. The Work at Home Mom
6. Infertility, Part I: Primary and Secondary Infertility
7. Infertility, Part II: The Empty Womb and Adoption
8. The Modest Mom
9. Breastfeeding and Child Attachment
10. The Weary Mom, Part I
11. The Weary Mom, Part II
12. The Homeschooling Mother
13. Mothering a Child with Special Needs
14. Raising Real Men
15. Raising Homemakers
16. Be Fruitful and Multiply
17. Biblical Motherhood
18. Leaving a Legacy

153 pages $7.99 $3.99

The idea that a mother's place is in the home is no longer a popular one - not even within the Church. That said, most God-fearing mothers who choose a career over staying at home are not necessarily motivated by selfish desires, but by a culture which seems to leave them with no choice. It just doesn't make sense when an extra income would surely be more beneficial for their children in the long run... wouldn't it?

Scene #1: Perhaps a couple recognizes their young children are extraordinarily gifted and bright. University is certainly within their future. The parents want to give each of them the gift of a good, post-secondary education but know that's not possible on the husband's income alone. So Mom searches through the Yellow Pages and begins working from 8am-4pm - for the good of her children.Scene #2: Or maybe, as was the case with one of my grandmothers, a mother grew up in a very poor family and was never able to enjoy the kind of material wealth that seemed common place for everyone else. She doesn't want her children to know the pain of doing without and so works hard to bring in a paycheck that will cover trendy clothes, restaurant meals, and the latest technological gadgets that all the other kids on the block seem to have.Scene #3: Perhaps it's the cost of Christian schooling that forces a mother to work outside the home. It breaks her heart to drop her 10-month-old off at her sister-in-law's each morning, but she quickly reminds herself that the value of a Christian education is worth the temporary sacrifice.
The mother in each one of these examples has made her decision, perhaps with the support of her husband, based on "common sense." To the human mind, (especially the one that has been affected by years of feminism, liberal rhetoric, and publicly funded Marxism) it's perfectly logical to submit ourselves to "expert" opinion and abandon our kids while they're young in order to give them what they really need when they are older.

However, one very important detail is missing from each of these scenarios. Did you catch it?

A mother and father may arrive at the decision for her to work outside the home together after much consideration. Perhaps they even commit Mom's new job to the Lord in prayer. Maybe the children are made aware of the new changes and everyone agrees that this is what is best for their family. But through all the deliberations, the Bible remains on the shelf, and no one stops to ask, "What would God want Mom to do?"
"'The Lord told me,' is no substitute for 'the Bible says.'" - Voddie BauchamI am not suggesting that no woman can ever have a career, that parents shouldn't send their child to university or pay for their tuition (that's a topic for another day), give them good gifts, make every effort to provide them with a Christian education, or that a mother can't supplement the family income (if I believed that, I wouldn't have this blog or have written my two eBooks, How To Design Your Own Blog and How To Grow Your Blog And Manage Your Home).

I'm asking you, dear mother, to examine where God considers your presence most important. There are several parental responsibilities required of us that are difficult or impossible to perform if we are physically away from our children:

• Availability - morning, noon, and night (Deuteronomy 6:7)
• Training (Proverbs 22:6)
• Discipline (Proverbs 29:15-17)
• Teaching the Scriptures (Deuteronomy 4:10)
• Nurturing (Titus 2:4)

• Does my absence mean someone else will care for my children?

• How long will they be under another's care each day?

• Is this the person I want to raise and influence my child in my place?

• How many surrogate mothers will be involved over the years?

• What impact will that have?

• Does my job sap my energies so that I am tired and pressured and unable to give them quality time?

• Are my creativity, my wit, and my best efforts spent outside my family?

• Do they get only the leftovers?

The biblical solution involves a radical reform in our thinking. Christians must operate on the premise that pure and undefiled religion requires individual benevolence towards widows (James 1:27), families must take responsibility and look after their own (1 Timothy 5:8, 16), and the local church (whose diaconal ministry would be well funded if we tithed more than 2%) is called to care for those who are truly widows (1 Timothy 5: 3-16).

Mom, your job is so eternally important, that God ensured there would be a way for you to minister through full-time motherhood. The right thing to do is not often the easiest thing to do. Staying at home to raise your children will cost you. It may require painful sacrifices, tighter budgets, and perhaps even swallowing our pride enough to accept the aid available to us. But I believe it can be done and that the reward you receive will be eternally worth it.

If financial concerns are keeping you back from staying home with your children, here are some articles and books to help and encourage you.
Articles

• Saving Money In Your Baby's First Year
• Income-Earning Ideas
• We Couldn't Afford Children - Glad We Didn't Have To
• You CAN Stay Home - Earning Money From Home

• Money Saving Mom by Crystal Paine
• Family Feasts for $75 a Week by Mary Ostyn
• America's Cheapest Family by Annette Economides
• Large Family Logistics by Kim Brenneman

My Pinterest page has a board entitled "Feminine Flair." It's pictures are full of ruffles, lace, and lovely dresses - things that spell f-e-m-i-n-i-n-e to me. If I knew how to sew well and money was no object, I suppose I'd dress like this all the time.

The truth is, you'll often find me in a pair of blue jeans. I'm slowly building up the number of skirts in my wardrobe, but more often then not, the practicality of wearing a pair of pants with toddlers around the house and a sizable garden wins over a sweeping skirt. Some have asked why I believe it's permissible for a woman to wear pants, citing Deuteronomy 22:5 as a case for skirts only.

“A woman shall not wear anything that pertains to a man, nor shall a man put on a woman’s garment, for all who do so are an abomination to the LORD your God."
If the reason a woman must not wear pants is because they pertain to men, what do we do with Boaz, King Saul, and Aaron who were all cited as wearing skirts or cloaks as was the custom in Biblical times? Men of ancient Greece and Rome wore skirts, as did American Indian and Scottish males.

It makes me cringe when I hear people say, "That passage of Scripture doesn't apply to me because it's relating to a cultural issue of their day." The infamous cop-out may be over used, but there is still a danger of reading into a passage in order to make it suit our fancy. Deuteronomy 22:5 is not speaking about whether a woman should wear pants or skirts, but against transvestism - cross-dressing to appear as someone of the opposite sex.

The manner in how a culture dresses differs from one era and place to the next. What doesn't change is our responsibility to appear distinctly female. To pervert our designated sexuality (which God called very good) by blurring the gender lines in the way we dress is an abomination to the Lord.

In any case, modesty is the principal of female attire. There are women, even in the church, who wear skirts that are far less modest than any pair of blue jeans I have ever seen. That's not necessarily an argument for wearing pants to church, but a plea to switch from a hooker-style skirt where the outline of your thong is clearly visible, to something that speaks of gracefulness and humility within. (1 Peter 3:3-6)

Be it pants or a skirts, a woman's job is to dress like a female. There is room for creativity and a personal sense of style in God's design. Whatever you choose to throw on in the morning, may it be something that exudes those qualities of a woman which God calls very precious in His sight: gentleness, submissiveness, and a quiet spirit.

Many women reference Deborah, the Old Testament "prophetess," as our exemplary when it comes to women and leadership. There is no question the Deborah performed her job well, or that God used her to deliver Israel - that's exactly God's point. There was not a single man with courage enough to take the responsibility and lead. To Israel's great shame, God raised up a woman to support the men and warn them of their cowardice.

The Botkin sisters in their book So Much More say, "The role of a Deborah is not one we should be hoping for, but one we should be trying at all costs to prevent. If our society ever sinks to the level where one Deborah is necessary, it will be a sign that God is phenomenally displeased with our culture and is inflicting a colossal curse on it. Deborah was glorified and blessed by God as a deliverer of Israel, and, in essence, what she did was to bring men back into leadership." To build a doctrine around the exception God used is Israel's history because of their sin, and refuse to take the rest of the passages in the Bible about women and leadership (1 Timothy 11-14; 1 Corinthians 14: 34-35) at face value is, as Debi Pearl says, "just as foolish as Deborah leading the armies instead of a man." (Created to be His Help Meet, pg. 120).
It may be true that women can "do just as good of a job as men, or even better." She may be more "qualified" than any other male to serve in a position of authority over men. But simply being more capable of doing something doesn't make doing it right. I may be an exceptionally good marksman, but I would still be guilty of breaking the 6th commandment if I utilized my "gift" by going on a shooting rampage. However good a woman's intentions may be, the end never justifies the means.
The very best thing a woman can do for society it to purse God's perfect design for her and willingly submit herself to the God-ordained authority of man in church (1Timothy 2:11-14; 1 Corinthians 14:34-35), civil magistrate (1 Corinthians 11:3; Ex. 18:2, Deuteronomy 17:14-20) and home (Ephesians 5:22-24). In this way, perhaps her righteousness will entreat God to revoke His judgment and shower down blessings on a nation instead. photo via

Don't you hate it when you go shopping for a skirt and every. single. one. on the rack is too short to be comfortably modest? All these adorable prints and styles, none of them long enough...

If a skirt is too long, you can shorten it easily. But when they start out too short, your options are either:

a). Buy it, and sit with your legs glued together so as not to display your unmentionables unnecessarily. Also, avoid bending over (particularly impossible is you have several small children)

OR

b). Don't buy it. Save up to purchase a longer skirt for twice the price, or hope that your mother-in-love has some spare time to sew you a custom design.

Until two weeks ago, I thought I only had two options, but now I've got three! I discovered the skirt extenders from Shell Sheli while searching online for modest camisoles (which they also sell), and now I have an easy solution to lengthening those cute skirts I would previously leave on the rack!

Much like you would layer a tank top or camisole underneath a short or low-cut shirt, the Shell Sheli skirt extenders provide you with extra coverage, warmth, and style.

Of the two brands of skirt extenders available from Shel Shelli, I have the SuperSlip in both the A-line and Pencil Skirt versions. The top half of the skirt extender is made from a silky polyester that functions like a regular slip and keeps your skirt from clinging of bunching up when you move. The bottom half is made from a thicker cotton material that provides comfortable coverage.

If you own a skirt you have to think twice about wearing, want an easy solution to extending the length of any skirt that catches your eye, wish you could stay as warm wearing skirts as you do wearing pants, or simply like the layered look, then the Shell Sheli skirt extender would make a great addition to your wardrobe. They come in sizes XS-XL, and are available in A-line and Pencil styles.

Just because, Shell Sheli is offering you 15% off any purchase from their store (which also includes short sleeve and long sleeve layering shells, layering dresses, and KikiRiki skirt extenders) with coupon code “justbc15.” Sale ends Tuesday at midnight.

In the interest of full disclosure, some of the links in this post are affiliate links. This means that if you click on the link and purchase the item, I receive an affiliate commission at no extra cost to you. I only recommend products I use personally. Your purchases through these links help support Growing Home. Thank you for your support.
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20 weeks of bed-rest gave me plenty of time to do something I really enjoy but find hard to make time for during "normal" seasons of my life - reading. I haven't read this much since studying for my counselling certificates from CCEF over five years ago!

Apart from the Bible (especially the Psalms), by far the most encouraging, uplifting, and spiritually rewarding book I've read over the past few months was Kelly Crawford's Devotions, Advice, and Renewal for when Motherhood Feels Too Hard.

With 31 chapters (and 10 ingenious survival tips), it's meant to be read as inspiration for each day of the month. However, things didn't quite work out that way for me. I was so caught up in the message of the book, I finished the whole thing in two days! Ooopsies. No matter though. I know I'll refer back to it many times throughout this motherhood journey!

Kelly's blog, Generation Cedar, was one of the very first blogs I started reading regularly after we heard of it during her interview with Kevin Swanson on Generations With Vision. I immediately fell in love with her writing style and the content of her message. She's been a well-spring of encouragement and her thought-provoking articles have initiated many a conversation between my husband and I.

As busy homeschooling Mom who is also "in the trenches" with her own brood of blessings (#10 on the way!), Kelly's message of encouragement is real. Chances are she's been there and done that. When Motherhood Feels Too Hard provides an honest look at the challenges mothers face in the raising of their children and reminds us why it's all worth it. We are called to our glorious work by the Lord and through Him, we can receive sustaining grace and tremendous reward!

If you're struggling with your lot in life as a mother, question your usefulness, or simply need to be reminded that this is all worth it, you need to get a copy of Kelly's book. At just $8.99 for a paperback ($4.97 for an eBook), Devotions, Advice, and Renewal for When Motherhood Feels Too Hard is available for an affordable price that can't be passed up.

Last week, I wrote something in a Facebook status that shouldn't have been written. It was an attempt at humor, but ended up being more off-color than funny. An older, wiser, godly friend wrote me about it.

Initially, I felt hurt and offended. "It's none of her business what I write," I thought. I didn't want to respond in a reactionary way (it's a sure way to make an even bigger fool of myself, I've discovered), so I mulled over her words for a while before re-reading them again after I had cooled down.

Everything she had written was done in a spirit of love and gentleness. She presented the truth and offered it up with plenty of grace and forgiveness. Like a good Titus 2 mentor, she took the opportunity to teach me "to be discreet, chaste, good... that the word of God be not blasphemed." (v.5) She wrote be because she was taking her responsibility to "be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, teachers of good things" seriously (v.5).

It wasn't about picking a bone with me. In all the years I've known her, she's never been one to offer cutting, critical, or dissenting opinions, or insist on having the last word. It's out of character for her to be disagreeable or write to prove how much she knows. She is sweet, gracious, kind, wise, godly, and clothed with humility.

The more I thought about it, the more I realized how blessed I am to have someone in my life who, in an era where it's cool to scream "Intolerance!" to anyone who picks up on our sin, cares enough about my personal holiness and spiritual well-being to risk friendship, misunderstanding, criticism, gossip, and being falsely accused of judgementalism, legalism, and self-righteousness. I was floored when I realized what she put at stake out of genuine concern for my own reputation and well-being!

On the one hand we younger mothers often bemoan the lack of Titus 2 mentors; on the other, we get upset when they are courageous enough to do their job. Having a mentor isn't just about receiving practical help, advice, and words of encouragement; it's about desiring to live a holy life that's pleasing to God, which necessarily entails being confronted in our sin at some point or another.
"Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby." Hebrews 12:11"It's just a phase they all go through," we explain as we reprimand our toddler for snapping "NO!" at us again.

"Sarcasm is my spiritual gift," we laugh in an attempt to soften the edges of our cutting words.

"I'm just sayin' it like it it," we confirm of an honest statement, not spoken in kindness.

"I'm not arguing; I'm enjoying a healthy debate," we justify of our need to always have the last word.

"I'm just sharing my concerns so we can pray for her more specifically," we gossip about the details of another's life during prayer meeting.

We are adept at wrapping up sin with pretty bows. Who can argue against a "natural progression" in childhood development, a joke, honesty, a healthy debate, or prayer without appearing to judge another's motives or reeking or self-righteousness? We feel so insured and justified by our ability to reason sin away, and few things are more painful then someone tugging at the end of our ribbons to reveal what's inside and call it by name.

Suddenly the Bible, which seemed to have nothing to say about the sin we cleverly concealed, comes alive with rebuttals to put our accusers in their place.

"Judge not that you been not judged," we quote perfectly.

"How about you worry about the plank in your own eye before pointing out the speck in mine," we ask, referencing Matthew 7:3.

"The Lord knows my heart," we say, as if that's supposed to be comforting.

Excusing our sin and taking offense to biblical reproof doesn't just categorize us as fools (Proverbs 28:13; 1:5; 12:1; 9:8), it stunts our spiritual growth, and eliminates opportunities to live out the Gospel for our children and all those we meet.

It's not until we begin to grasp God's holiness, our grave depravity, and His extraordinary grace and forgiveness that we can understand and appreciate the biblical institution of mentorship, and seek out a godly role model who is willing to address our unhealthy habits with Scripture and in Christian love so we can become more and more like the God we claim to serve.

What if you could be mentored by 17 Moms? Well, you can through our brand-new, 153-page eBook, The Pursuit of Motherhood! It covers everything from homeschooling, adoption, and infertility, to breast-feeding, special needs children, and leaving a legacy... and it's on sale for $3.99 to help you ring in the New Year with a new attitude! You can read more about it and view the Table of Contents here.

The Pursuit of Motherhood
153 pages
$7.99 $3.99

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Linking to: Raising Homemakers, Deep Roots At Home, Raising Arrows, A Wise Woman.,Walking Redeemed,, The Modest Mom, A Mama's Story, We ARE That Family, Raising Mighty Arrows, Hearts For Home, Frugal Homeschool Family Time Warp Wife

I must begin with a confession: I'm a rather old school sort of girl who doesn't own a cell phone. It's not that I have anything against them; I've simply never had the need or desire to stay up to date with the latest technology. You might think that my relationships would be perfect then, since I don't have a little gadget constantly buzzing in my back pocket for attention.

However, I have a computer, and though it is an ancient beast that causes the middle of my desk to sag, it has the power to wield the same time-wasting, relationship-breaking temptation as latest iPhone model. As a mother to two young children and an avid blogger, I'm becoming increasingly aware of the need to turn off the power and focus on building relationships with these precious souls that have been entrusted into our care for such a short time.One day, I will say to Charity, "Please don't rub the diaper cream in your hair; it's not shampoo," and she won't. One day, after Judah spits up sour milk into the carpet and I hurry to clean it up before the bacteria can start to brew, I'll say, "Oh Judah! You're too big to be spitting up your milk!" and my floor will stay clean. One day, I will hesitantly step out of bed in the morning and be surprised to discover that there is no herd of stuffed animals waiting in the hall to sprain my ankle. One day, when I ask, "Can I just have two minutes of peace and quiet?" I will be answered with a deafening silence. One day, when I say, "Mommy just has to write a blog post for a minute. I'll be right back," as I walk down the stairs, I will return, and my children will be gone.Are we willing to turn off the technology so we can mother like Jochabed? Can you see her there, nursing Moses, praying for him, and teaching him the truth about the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob? In the few short years between Moses' birth and the time he was weaned, his parent's influence was so great that we find Moses listed among the heroes of faith: "By faith, Moses, when he was come to years, refused to be called the son of Pharoah's daughter." (Hebrews 11: 24)Time is short, and the precious few moments we're given with our children are fleeting. It can be a real challenge trying to keep up with emails that require a response, comments that need to be published, and a Facebook status that's waiting to be updated. As much as I hate to admit it, it really doesn't matter if any of these things get done today. There are other lovely blogs for people to read, and other pages to "like." But my children - I only have them on loan for a short while and the time in which they are most impressionable? Once it's gone, it's gone. Seize the day. Spend as much time as you can training them up in the way that they should go, so that, when they are old, they will not depart from it (Proverbs 22:6).

Flipping through the Dictionary the other day, I discovered something about myself.

-ist a suffix of nouns, often corresponding to verbs ending in -ize or nouns ending in -ism, that denote a person who practices or is concerned with something, or holds certain principles, doctrines, etc. Origin: Middle English -iste < Latin -ista < Greek -istēs; in some words, representing French -iste, German -ist, Italian -ista, etc.,A lyricist is one who writes words to a song.

A perfectionist is one who wants things to be perfect.

A terrorist is one who causes terror.

An herbalist is one who specializes in herbs.

A feminist, in the truest sense of the word, is one who is concerned with femininity. And so it is that I am a feminist.

Logically, the only One authorized to define femininity is the Creator of females. That means God (not Marie Stopes, Coco Chanel, Betty Friedan, Gloria Steinem, or culture), gets to describe - no, order -what a true feminist ought to look like. He does so in Proverbs 31:

• She is pure (v. 10).
• She is a trustworthy treasure to her husband (v. 10,11, 12, 23, 28b, 29).
• She is concerned for the well-being of her family (v. 13, 14, 15, 18b, 19, 22, 27).
• She is hard-working and industrious (v. 13-22, 24, 27, 31).
• She is clothed with strength and dignity (v. 17, 25).
• She is skilled in managing finances (v. 14, 16).
• She is courageous in character (v. 25, 29).
• She is kind and compassionate (v. 20, 26).
• She is wise (v. 26).
• She is praised by her children and husband (v. 28, 29).
• She is holy (v. 30).
• She is blessed (v. 31).

Biblical femininity says men and women are equal in importance, status, honor, and dignity (Genesis 3:18). Both men and women are equally fallen (Romans 2:23), and equally able to be rescued from their sin and condemnation through the death and resurrection of the Lord Jesus Christ (John 3:16).

However equal, their roles are different. God’s purpose for humanity includes complementary relationships between men and women so that a lost and dying world can be confronted with the Gospel through living portraits of God's love for His Bride, the Church.

Husbands are to picture Christ by loving their wives (Ephesians 5: 25-33; 1 Peter 3:7), and wives are to be submissive to their husbands (Ephesians 5:22-24; 1 Timothy 2:12). Men are responsible for leading their families spiritually and supporting them financially (1 Timothy 3:4; 5:8). Wives, in addition to the duties outlined in Proverbs 31, are exhorted to love their husbands, love their children (which assumes desiring them), keep a home, and live in obedience, meekness, and a quiet spirit which is very precious in the sight of both God and her husband (Titus 2:3-5; 1 Peter 3:1-6).
"Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee." Genesis 3:16 (emphasis mine)Sin oppresses women. Sin from within ourselves, and sin that comes at us through other men and women. Sin makes us desire roles we were not created to fulfill. Sin makes us reject authority rather than be submissive to it. Sin glorifies climbing a corporate ladder over serving "the least of these" at home. Sin calls meekness "weakness," and favors boldness over quietness in a woman. Sin puts me first and my family last. Sin blurs scripturally distinctive gender roles and makes the opposite of God's design seem more attractive.

Jesus came to set us free from the sin that holds us in bondage. Freedom and liberation are not found in departing from God's design, but submitting to it out of obedience and love to the One who bought our salvation, purpose, status, dignity, and value with His blood (John 14:15; 1 Corinthians 7:23; Romans 6:22)."Feminism" doesn't liberate women; Jesus does.
"Feminism" isn't feminine at all. "Feminists" are really masculinists: people who are concerned with becoming masculine. Until females become feminine and males become masculine as God created them to be, relying on His forgiveness and grace for freedom and fulfillment within their roles, they will continue to feel oppressed, confused, shackled, afflicted, and demand their "rights" to positions God did not give them.

Let women be feminists: those who are concerned with femininity.

Let men be masculinists: those who are concerned with masculinity.

Let us all be concerned with the chief end of man: to glorify God and enjoy Him forever (The Westminster Shorter Catechism, Q & A 1; Ps. 86:9; Isa. 60:21; Rom. 11:36; I Cor. 6:20; 10:31; Rev. 4:11; Ps. 16:5-11; 144:15; Isa. 12:2; Luke 2:10; Phil. 4:4; Rev. 21:3-4).

Are you a true feminist? One who is concerned with biblical femininity? Then you'll love our new, 153-page eBook, The Pursuit of Motherhood! You can read more about it and view the Table of Contents here.

The Pursuit of Motherhood
153 pages $7.99

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Each winter, I hear this question: "Do you have any tips for dressing modestly while staying warm? I'm just so freezing cold when I wear skirts!"Before I attempt to answer this, you need to know two things:

• I don't really have a sense of style (just ask my sisters!). I have budget-sense though, so most of these tips are more finance conscious than fashion conscious, although I do try to look somewhat put together. :)
• I'm not a "skirts only" girl, although I do love them! None of these pictures show me in pants, but I wear them quite regularly (you can read more about my thoughts on pants vs. skirts here).

1. Invest in 1 to 3 high-quality skirts. Pick a style you love in a neutral color that can match virtually anything. I am wearing the same skirt in all of these photos. I spent a bit more money on it, but I've been wearing it at least once a week since April (pictured above) and it's still not showing any signs of wear.

2. For warmth and a higher neckline, wear a tank top backwards! Make sure it's of the tagless variety or that the tag can easily be cut off, or that written tags on the inside of the tank can't be seen from the outside. For obvious reasons, racerback tanks don't work for this.

If you can afford to spend a bit more, I highly recommend the Undercover Mama Nursing Tanks from Deborah & Co. I have three of them and wear them all the time, even though I'm not nursing anymore (long story). They are long, which makes them great for layering. They also clasp onto any bra strap which means they are:

• perfect for nursing
• minimize the amount of straps underneath your actual shirt
• can be adjusted to sit at a neckline height that makes you feel the most comfortable

3. Invest in some high-quality, fleece-lined leggings. I have two pairs. I cheaped out on one of them and am paying for it: the fit isn't nearly as comfortable as my other pair from Deborah & Co., and they're not quite as warm either.

These fleece-lined leggings from Deborah & Co. are the ultimate solution to cold legs! I love them because:

• they keep me warm all over. I can wear a t-shirt in the middle of Winter with these things on and still stay toasty (I love wearing shorter sleeved shirts year-round; it's much less of a hassle when bathing children, washing dishes, or doing other jobs where long sleeves tend to get in the way).
• they add no bulk. Their thickness is equivalent to a regular pair of tights, but they're much warmer.
• my skirt doesn't cling to them like it does to a pair of tights of nylons. I really dislike wearing slips and was thrilled to discover I could do without one when I wear these leggings
• they come in all the right colors: black, brown, and charcoal.
• they are comfortable. Unlike nylons, they don't hike up past my belly button.
• they don't rip, snag, or have to be thrown out after one use, unlike nylons which I may have mentioned are my nemesis.
• they keep my feet free. I love bare toes as much as I hate nylons.

4. Wear a pretty scarf. Scarves:

• are cheap
• come in hundreds of different colors, prints, and styles to coordinate with any outfit
• make lower cut shirts more forgiving
• keep your cleavage hidden
• warm your neck
• can double as an emergency nursing cover
• make you look slightly fashion savvy, even if you're not at all
• okay, I digress...

To save money, I sometimes shop thrift stores. I usually pass on the second-hand tops since they often look worn, but have been able to find a few long skirts that were hardly used. I typically buy my tops at the end of the season when prices are reduced for clearance. I never pay full price for clothing. If I make purchases online, the item is either on sale or includes free shipping.

My Modest Clothing Sources:

High quality, modest skirts & dresses

• Deborah & Co.
• eShakti
• For Elyse (not a huge fan of all their clothes, but they have some nice, long skirts for reasonable prices)
• Shabby Apple
• Shell Sheli (skirt extenders)

• HALFTEE
• Deborah & Co.
• Shell Sheli

• Deborah & Co.

• For Eylse
• Peach Couture

Use code "frosty15" at checkout and save 15% OFF any product from Shell Sheli. Sale ends December 16.

Use code "stylefortheseason" to save 10% OFF any product from Deborah & Co. Sale ends December 13.

***
Fleece-Lined Leggings Giveaway! Courtesy of Deborah & Co.!

a Rafflecopter giveawayVisit My Other Friends For More Holiday Outfit Ideas! Smithspirations A Mama's Story Raising Mighty Arrows Artful Homemaking The Modest Mom Little Natural Cottage A Delightful Glow Raising Arrows Thankful Homemaker In The Nursery Of The Nation

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The Wise Mom, The Praying Mom, The Single Mom, The Stepmom, The Working Mom, The Healthy Mom, The Work at Home Mom, The Modest Mom, The Stressed Mom, The Homeschooling Mom, The Special Needs Mom, The Mom Who Desires More Children, The Weary Mom...

$7.99 Introductory price: $3.99

We Moms are a varied bunch, but we all have one thing in common: we have children to raise. Children, given to us from the hand of God, to raise for His honor and glory.
Motherhood can be overwhelming (for me, anyway). Our boys, how do we raise them to be real men in a world that confuses chivalry with chauvinism? And our daughters, is preparing them to be homemakers setting them up for disappointment?
Breast or bottle? What if you can't breastfeed? Cloth or disposables? Work from home, away from home, or not at all? Homeschool, private school, or public school? Birth control or Quiverfull?
So many questions. So many decisions. So little time; that's why we wrote The Pursuit of Motherhood.
The goal of The Pursuit of Motherhood is to sift through the sideline issues and encourage Moms in every situation to pursue mothering their children with all their heart, keeping God at the center of all their endeavors. "The aged women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2:3-5 (emphasis mine) The Pursuit of Motherhood is authored by 17 Moms including Kelly Crawford from Generation Cedar, June Fuentes from A Wise Woman, Jacqueline Franks from Deep Roots At Home, Melanie Young from Raising Real Men, and yours truly.
We share in common a love for the Lord and a love for our families, however imperfect. We sincerely desire the same for you and pray that this eBook will give you an uncommon vision for motherhood an the tools to restore its glory within your own home.

The Pursuit of Motherhood 151 pages $7.99 Introductory price: $3.99

Table of Contents

1. The Praying Mother
2. Mothering Through the Little Years
3. The Working Mom
4. The Healthy Mom
5. The Work at Home Mom
6. Infertility, Part I: Primary and Secondary Infertility
7. Infertility, Part II: The Empty Womb and Adoption
8. The Modest Mom
9. Breastfeeding and Child Attachment
10. The Weary Mom, Part I
11. The Weary Mom, Part II
12. The Homeschooling Mother
13. Mothering a Child with Special Needs
14. Raising Real Men
15. Raising Homemakers
16. Be Fruitful and Multiply
17. Biblical Motherhood
18. Leaving a Legacy

The Pursuit of Motherhood 151 pages $7.99 Introductory price: $3.99

Winner will be announced Tuesday, December 3.
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The first step to becoming an excellent manager of your home is to understand your role and why it is so important.

As a whole, our culture dismisses the impact of a faithful homemaker and constructs stereotypes that are outlandishly opposed to our exemplary in Proverbs 31. For instance, note who gets attacked when one young girl says she's going to be a nurse and the other says she's preparing to be a homemaker, which, biblically and historically, is God's normative plan for women. It is considered a waste of talent and intelligence to bless your family with the gifts God has given you for eternal rewards, but admirable if a paper certifies a particular area of focus and you get paid monetarily.

We must not rely on society's view of homemaking as our source of strength, purpose, and encouragement. Our value and fulfillment is found when we understand that the almighty God of the universe has called us to this task, and therefore, there is no greater work as a wife and mother that we could be doing.
"... teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed." Titus 2: 4The title "manager" denotes different types of jobs we must oversee to ensure our homes are running smoothly. Let's list them:

• Accountant
• Baker
• Chauffeur
• Cheerleader
• Chef
• Coach
• Counselor
• Dean of Education
• Entertainer
• Fashion Coordinator
• Food Service Manager
• Filing Clerk
• Fitness Trainer
• Gardener
• Gift Coordinator
• Health-care Practitioner
• Interior Designer
• Laundress
• Maid
• Purchasing Agent
• Referee
• Secretary
• Short-order Cook
• Travel Agent

A woman who purposely trains to do all these things well will not just be an asset to her husband, but should the Lord call her to singleness, she will be able to minister well to anyone, wherever she is planted. This is why I tell my daughters that preparing to be a godly homemaker thrills Mommy's heart just as much, if not more, than having them trained, indebted, and degreed, in one particular field of interest at college.
"Putting up the lunch for the children or cooking a good meal for the family may seem very insignificant tasks as compared with giving a lecture, writing a book, or doing other things that have a larger audience; but I doubt very much if, in the ultimate reckoning, they will count for as much." ~Laura Ingalls Wilder, Little House in the OzarksOnce you begin to understand and embrace the importance of your place inside your home, you can begin to draft a "mission statement" to refer to when you're feeling weary in well-doing, or you need to be reminded of your vision. It can be as simple as photo-copying Proverbs 31 and posting it on your fridge, or writing out your own summary on a note card and placing it above your sink. I've written mine inside my journal where I see it everyday:

"Called, authorized, and empowered by my Redeemer and Friend, with the blessing and support of my husband, my mission as the Keeper of our Home is to create an atmosphere of grace and forgiveness, order and flexibility, warm love and gentle affection, nutritious meals and fragrant aromas, conversation and education."
I want our home to be: (Check all that apply)

• Welcoming
• Stressful
• Warm
• Light
• Dark
• Messy
• Cluttered
• Happy
• Perfect
• Neat
• Chaotic
• Tidy
• Educational
• Shiny
• Sloppy
• Organized
• Attractive
• Dusty
• Beautiful
• Positive
• Well-arranged
• Tense
• Fun
• Calm
• Rigid
• Creative
• Chaotic
• Cozy
• Unique
• Balanced
• Homey
• Joyful
• Tacky
• Intense
• Purposeful
• Simple
• Appropriate
• Immaculate
• Functional
• Fresh Bright
• Expensive
• Relaxed

Recommend Resources
These titles encourage Keepers of The Home in their God-given calling. I'll list resources specific to organizing and maintaining different areas of the home as we cover them in this series. These are my affiliate links, but you are under no obligation to use them!

• Passionate Housewives Desperate For God by Jennie Chancey and Stacy McDonald
• The Excellent Wife by Martha Peace
• Queen of the Home by Jennifer McBride
• The Ministry of Motherhood by Sally Clarkson
• Praise Her In The Gates by Nancy Wilson
• Home-Making by J. R. Miller
• Large Family Logistics by Kim Brenneman

Part 1: Keeping A Growing Home | A Management Series for Moms Part 2: Keeping A Growing Home | Know Your Role! Part 3: Keeping A Growing Home | Making Priorities & 15 Good Things I Don't Do Part 4: Keeping A Growing Home | Time-Saving Home Management Tips Part 5: Keeping A Growing Home | My Daily Schedule

If you enjoyed this post, you may wish to follow Growing Home for updates via Google Friend Connect, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google +, or have them emailed directly to your inbox.
Linking to: Raising Homemakers, Deep Roots At Home, Raising Arrows, A Wise Woman.,Walking Redeemed, The Better Mom, The Modest Mom, A Mama's Story, We ARE That Family, Raising Mighty Arrows, Hearts For Home, Frugal Homeschool Family,

Recently I was asked a question I had heard many times before: "How do you get everything done in a day when you have three small children and a blog? I only have one child and I can't even keep up!"

Truthfully, I don't get it all done in a day and I often feel way behind on everything. I can't remember when each room in our house was tidy at the same time or the last time I had all the laundry caught up.

That's why I want to do this reality series, because if keeping a home entails a perfectly tidy house, an organized linen closet, well-behaved, homeschooled children, and an empty laundry basket, I fear we're all doomed. It must be something more.

Yes, more!

Gloriously managing a home does not mean the laundry is always caught up, the towels are straight, and the kitchen counter is clear of clutter. It means rolling with the punches, giving yourself grace, determining to make the most of every opportunity to love and serve your family, and pleading God's promises, understanding that there is nothing more important as a wife and mother than your place in the home and the powerful influence you wield in your family.

Becoming an excellent homemaker is a growing process, not an overnight change. Life happens. When I've spent three nights in a row cleaning up after sick family members and cannot see beyond the mountain of laundry or dirty dishes in the sink, I must remember that God knew I would be facing this situation when He called me to be a Keeper of the Home and will see me through it if I choose to place it in His hands.

Our house was messier when we only had one child. I wondered how in the world I could handle more of them, homeschool, and keep our home running smoothly. God faithfully gives grace every day and always enough time for the necessary things to get accomplished. It's up to me how to learn to prioritize and manage it effectively.

Care for our children's souls must always trump cleaning floors and decorating drywall; our house will be rubble one day, but their hearts are eternal. Some days that means all we do is read books and take a walk to the park. Some days it can mean making three healthy meals plus extras for the freezer, accomplishing two days worth of school work, folding four baskets of wash, taking the kids to swimming lessons, and getting the bathroom deep cleaned.

The longer we're married and the more children we have, the more tools God gives to help me become better at this task. In this series, I hope to:

• share my favorite time-management tricks,
• share how I prioritize my list of things that "need" to get done
• homemaking stuff I don't do,
• recommend a list of invaluable resources,
• share my personal schedule,
• share real pictures of it all in action at our house.

Part 1: Keeping A Growing Home | A Management Series for Moms Part 2: Keeping A Growing Home | Know Your Role! Part 3: Keeping A Growing Home | Making Priorities & 15 Good Things I Don't Do Part 4: Keeping A Growing Home | Time-Saving Home Management Tips Part 5: Keeping A Growing Home | My Daily Schedule

If you enjoyed this post, you may wish to follow Growing Home for updates via Google Friend Connect, Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, Google +, or have them emailed directly to your inbox.
Linking to: Raising Homemakers, Deep Roots At Home, Raising Arrows, Time Warp Wife, A Wise Woman.,Walking Redeemed, The Better Mom, The Modest Mom, A Mama's Story, We ARE That Family, Raising Mighty Arrows, Hearts For Home, Frugal Homeschool Family, Moms The Word, Hip Homeschool Moms, Trivium Tuesdays, The Prairie Homestead

According to one report, the average stay-at-home mom is worth $138,095 a year. How does your salary compare? Are you living it up with all that dough? Or is the only dough you see baked in the oven and inhaled in seconds by your growing brood of young 'uns? Do you live on a shoestring budget, barely seeming to scrap enough cash together to keep your family clothed and fed? This $138K they're talking about... they're kidding right? Your six-year-old makes more money (thanks to the tooth-fairy) than you do!

Is it worth it? Scrubbing toilets, pulling weeds, sorting squabbles, fixing 1,000 square meals a year, folding laundry 'til 12am, changing diapers, cleaning up vomit, pregnancy, labor, delivery - all for nothing? Or is it for nothing? Oh, we may never line our pockets with a penny for our labors, but could it be that the dirtiest, hardest, most tiresome and demanding job in all creation could also carry with it heavenly rewards of eternal value?

To date, children have out performed both the stock market and gold in ROI over the past six thousand years. The truth is, real wealth isn't found in money or the things that money can buy. Our worthiness is found solo Christo. Only when we recognize this precious truth, it'll make sense to invest in same things found in God's portfolio, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal (Matthew 6:20).
God makes it clear that children are worth the cost. Staying at homewith your babes, teaching them the ways of the Lord when thou sittest in thine house, and when you walkest by the way, when thou liest down, and when thou risest up (Deuteronomy 11:19) is worth every penny you don't make. Those hard and ugly parts of mothering when you feel like you're being persecuted by your kids and all those who question the legitimacy of your profession? Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: for great is your reward in heaven... (Matthew 5:12). Jesus said, "Verily (truly) I say unto you, in as much as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." Matthew 25:40

Motherhood in this life is not without its perks either. Countless are the moments that money cannot buy. The first wail of your own child, fresh from the womb; a sleepy babe, suckling at your breast; "ma-ma"; wobbly steps; wet, slobbery kisses; wilted dandelion bouquets - these things are priceless. No other job comes with such a diverse benefits package.

On your death-bed, are you going to wish you had extra cash kicking around during those tough years where finances were always tight? Or, are you going to wish you had invested more time into the lives of your children? Will you wish you had invested in gold which perishes, or into the souls of the next generation which live on, and on, and on forever?

(Our family in 1997)
There are days when I struggle to be the 60-year-old mother of three active and involved young adults, aged 19, 19, and 21, but as my husband and I look back over what the Lord has done, we marvel at God's grace and mercy! We can't imagine life without these young people!

There is great joy in what the Lord has done for us... for you see, we were married for almost 19 years before we had the blessing of a child! The reason? We had not obeyed God's commands, and we suffered consequences that would reach over many years. In some ways, those consequences still continue today, though forgiven.

I will tell you the sad story.

The early 50s, when we grew up, saw increasing prosperity. After the terrors and hardships of WWII, families in the U.S. were focused on getting that new dishwasher, television, and maybe, even two cars. Women were leaving home for the job market in record numbers to have the extras.

(My family)
Then in the 60s and 70s, rebellion and 'free love' on college campuses exploded onto the scene. Most parents were totally unprepared to deal with it all, and thus, by default, didn't. Busy with earning a living, many parents were out of touch with the social pressures their young people faced, the anti-God stance in schools, and the growing fractures between generations.

(We are in the couple in the middle; not too serious about life)
My husband and I both had parents who loved us, but their generation generally did not find it easy (or were unaware of the need) to discuss deeper issues with their young people.

While on campus, we 'married' ourselves (without family or friends) in a chapel before 'God' on the I.U. Bloomington campus, and I lived in the frat house from Thursday to Sunday night. Life was all partying or studying. This was not at all abnormal during those years ('69-73) in the middle of the sexual revolution, the Vietnam War, Woodstock, and and the devaluation of life with the Roe V. Wade decision (1973).

Immediately out of nursing school, my boyfriend (now my husband of 38 years) and I lived together as did many, but certainly not all, of our classmates. We finally did get properly married, much to my mother's relief. We were 21 and 22.

Upon graduation as an RN, I worked in open-heart surgery at a large metropolitan hospital. Occasionally, when there was a need for extra personnel in the abortion area of that hospital, I would be called on to assist as were other surgical nurses. Even after being raised in a private Christian school environment (and calling myself a Christian), I was unable to apply the things I studied in my catechism class to real life decisions. I was for all practical purposes "dead in my trespasses and sins."

"And you were dead in the trespasses and sins in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of disobedience—" ~Eph. 2: 1
I am ashamed to say that we had an abortion several years into our marriage. We had bought into the worldly view of living for ourselves, careers, money, and things.

Two decisions forever changed the direction of my life~ 1.) breaking God's protective commands regarding the sacredness of marriage (having sex before marriage) and 2.) disregarding the sanctity of life (participating in and having an abortion). I didn't know it would affect my health, my fertility in years to come, or undermine our own self-respect or our respect for each other.

Nevertheless, God faithfully lead us to a solid Bible-believing church, and I finally accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior at 29. By this time, I was really suffering emotionally. The pain got my attention. You can't tell me that abortion doesn't mess you up! I had already had several miscarriages and knew there were other things wrong.

The worst were flashbacks to assisting in a surgical abortion one day at the hospital where I found a perfect, tiny hand less than the size of a dime stuck to the side of my gloved hand. It is terrible to remember it. I ran out of the OR and refused to go back. It has taken years for those scars to heal. I learned the value of human life in a split second. It wasn't tissue to me anymore; it was a baby!

Now slowly my perspective changed. My whole being desired to be a mother, to bring forth new life within our marriage and before God. And we could not! Years went by with several more miscarriages. We did two home-studies in order to adopt, one Korean, and one local, but the Lord chose to close the doors. These are stories in themselves... Many, many people at our church and other friends were praying for us.

After 8 years of pursuing medical help to conceive (Clomid and surgeries for endometriosis), and then 4 years off, I got a call from a surgeon I worked with who told me about a new procedure called GIFT (gamete intra-fallopian transfer). I was working nights, 7 days a week, to afford the earlier procedures since insurance wouldn't pay for infertility treatment. I felt the clock ticking the years off my life...

After much prayer and many tears, we decided to go ahead. The first GIFT produced 2 tiny heart beats seen on ultrasound at 4+ weeks. One was in the (wrong) fallopian tube... the damaged tube! We had a tubal pregnancy which is dangerous, but both babies failed to grow. It was so discouraging: over $11,000 and nothing to show for it, but stress and grief and high levels of drugs (Metrodin, Lupron, and Pergonal).

I was determined to continue since there was a 36% chance in those days of delivering a live baby. We were told there was no other way.

(I clung to the verses of Isaiah 54: 11-15, especially verse 13)
The second attempt went perfectly in every way. Twins! We were SO excited! My middle quickly got big, but in the fourth month I realized I was not growing in measurement. I was getting smaller!

(Two babies)
A hastily arranged ultrasound revealed that one of the little lives I carried had died several weeks before. We saw a separate sac with little bones, and were told our second baby might miscarry, too. We were crushed, and I was in anguish. I was guilty of all those earlier years, and just knew I was being punished.

I almost forgot about the life within me as I focused on the loss. "Why God?" Satan almost destroyed my joy, except that Jesus is greater! "Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." (1 Peter 5: 8)

Later, even though our other baby would be fine, I felt such frustration because if we didn't want an only child, we would have to go through another of these uniquely stressful procedures with all the costs, shots, and stress leading up to it. Then once the procedure is over, there is the waiting for that determining ultrasound to give you the news, good or bad!

Having a baby can easily become an idol! I had to get over it so I could focus on having a joyful heart for my husband and new son. It was the will of a loving, sovereign God, and His comforting presence was very real.
"... give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you." ~1 Thessalonians 5: 18

Finally, the day arrived, and the Lord in His mercy gave us a beautiful, healthy son. My aching arms were filled, and we dedicated him to the King of Kings for His glory!

I can't describe the joy and wonder of it all. We had been married 19 plus years!!

My doctor said I was 'jump-started' with all the hormones, so we did a third GIFT to give our new son a little brother or sister. We were blessed with adorable, healthy twins exactly two years later. We praise God for His abundant grace and mercy!

Now I value life!

It has been a long road to forgiving myself for assisting in and having an abortion, but I found the Lord has welcoming arms to forgive us when we come to Him in repentance. We are sinners, but by His grace, we have hope... and now can see His guiding hand in it all. Thank You, Lord, for birthing in us new life, spiritually and physically!
"... I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live." ~Deuteronomy 30: 19

The takeaway: We have been able to share with our children (appropriately, through time) the curses we had brought upon ourselves. That has protected them, to a large degree, from repeating the same mistakes which we made. It is a blessing to tell them of the mighty things that the LORD has done for us while we were yet in unbelief and of the restoring power found only in trusting Christ Jesus. Today we enjoy a rich relationship with each of our children by the grace of Almighty God. I share this with you to encourage and strengthen YOU that no matter where you find yourself, our gracious God is always at work. Never give up hope, dear one.
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For 38 years now, I have been first a wife, but also a teacher of our children in the home. Now a new season is here, and with the blessing of my husband, I write DeepRootsAtHome as an encouragement to myself and others. (Titus 2: 3-5) What I share will be varied and practical…focused on being a good steward at home, of our time, and our relationships…but I also love to do things that bring beauty and order to our hectic lives and reflect God’s creativity. Oh, may we learn how important our jobs are as we become older women of God to speak into the younger woman! The habits of the home in one generation become the morals of society in the next. As William Ross Wallace said: “The hand that rocks the cradle, rules the world.” 10 May, 1996 Washington Times.

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Holy Spirit Led Homeschooling, The Modest Mom, Raising Arrows, The Better Mom, A Mama's Story, Time-Warp Wife, Deep Roots At Home, Raising Homemakers, Women Living Well, A Wise Woman,

Recently, a sweet young mother emailed me for encouragement, as she and her husband are in the early stages of trusting God for the number of children in their family. This precious young mom has three little children, very close together, and is already receiving an abundance of negative feedback about her "large family." Unfortunately, most of the comments are from family and friends.

We live in an era when children are definitely thought of as a Burden, rather than a Blessing, and couples who dare to have more than two of these "hindrances" are considered to be ignorant, foolish, and totally out of touch with reality. Our society considers children to be inconvenient, a nuisance, unruly, expensive, dispensable, and a threat to an already over-populated world.

Frequently, even as Christians, we have the same view as the secular world around us. We no longer realize the value of a child. We've been indoctrinated into believing that the world is over-populated. In additon, our own experience seems to validate the fact that children aresometimes inconvenient, irritating, expensive, unruly and annoying!

However, the Bible teaches that children are a Blessing and a Reward! That means, it is our duty to adjust our thinking to align with what the Scripture says, not to reinterpret Scripture to match what the world says.
"Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward." Psalm 127:3.Why don't we view children as a Blessing?

The main problem is that we look at children from a temporal, earthly perspective. It is easy to see that children cost us money (sometimes lots of it!), get sick at the most inconvenient times, embarrass us in front of our friends, arrive in this world with their nights and days mixed up (and often revert to those primitive behaviors in their teen years!), and require years of education, training and sacrifice. So, how is that a blessing again? ;)

The key to understanding the blessing of children is to develop an eternal, spiritual perspective. God sees children as as blessing because they advance His kingdom. The Psalmist compares children to arrows in the hand of a warrior. Scripture teaches that we are in a spiritual battle, and our children are our weapons, who will one day wage war against the enemy and his strongholds.
"As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate." Psalm 127:4-5A second reason that children are a blessing is that they force us to grow up and to develop character. It is a baby that causes a carefree girl to become a caring, nurturing woman and an irresponsible lad to be transformed into a dependable man. Not that this metamorphosis is automatic or guaranteed, but being entrusted with the care and destiny of a living soul is such a sobering responsibility that many have been transformed by it. Also, we are so prone to self-centeredness, and it is our children that cause us to get over ourselves and to learn the blessing of self-sacrifice. As one mother of a large family confided to me many years ago, "With the birth of each new baby, I die to myself a little bit more."

And of course, children are a blessing to us just because they bring us pleasure, joy, and even entertainment! We enjoy their cute antics and clever little sayings and take much pride in their accomplishments. We enjoy being with them and doing things to bless them. We even take pleasure in the special way they say, Mommy or Daddy! If we will look a little deeper, we will see that this pictures the relationship that our Heavenly Father desires to have with us. He enjoys spending time with us, in giving us good gifts (Matthew 7:11), and He loves to hear us cry out to Him, saying Abba Father!

Why don't we want more of them?

A wise man once said: "The Bible calls debt a curse and children a blessing; but in our culture, we apply for a curse and reject blessings. Something is wrong with this picture." When we begin to see children the way Jesus sees them, we will desire more of His blessings in the form of children. Matthew 18:5 says, "And whoever receives and accepts and welcomes one little child like this for My sake and in My Name receives and accepts and welcomes Me." (Amplified version). Not that it will always be easy, or joyful, or pain free. Sometimes there is sacrifice in obedience, and tears mingled with joy as we walk a path of faith.

Back to the young mother I was corresponding with. She was worried about family members that were already upset about the number of children they had and would not welcome the news of another pregnancy. I encouraged this young mother not to worry about pleasing her family, but to just worry about pleasing God.

With this advice, I was transported back about 21 years when we announced that we were expecting our third child. I remember my mother-in-law being so distraught over the news. She just couldn't believe that we were going to have three children! Remembering how horrified she was at the thought of three grandchildren, I dreaded telling her about number four, and five... and well, I guess she got used to the announcements by the time we got down to number ten!

But, this is what I really want to share in this post. Those same babies that my dear mother-in-law was so unhappy to learn I was expecting, were the very ones who drove her to the store, to the bank, to the pharmacy, to doctor appointments and hair appointments these last years. They also mowed her lawn, planted flowers, killed various pests for her (including setting mouse traps and catching and disposing of mice!), hung pictures for her, mopped her floors, helped her up when she fell... and even discovered her when she had breathed her last. And those babies that came on down the line, they were the ones who ministered cheer to her daily with their irresistibly cute antics, their childish stories, and their unconditional love. They may have seemed like a burden to her in the beginning, but they were a blessing to her in the end!

The world sees children as a burden.... God sees children as a blessing to help share the burdens of life!
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Elizabeth is married to her wonderful husband Allan and a very busy mom of 10 children -- 6 sons and 4 daughters. She has been homeschooling since 1990 and am on the downward slide with just five children and twelve years to go! They are currently enjoying the delights of coastal living, while learning to deal with the challenges (sand gnats!). You can find her blogging at Yes, They're All Ours.

Things were so much simpler back in the days when everything was hard. You poured your sweat into the soil and fought for a crop that would see your family through until the next harvest. There was no struggle for excessive cash flow as needs were basic and lacked extravagance. The Industrial Age had not yet left its indelible mark and the frenzy of electronics hadn't swept in complicating everything with it's simplification.

But more specifically, birth control was not yet in vogue.
Responsible planning now means you snatch up a great house in an area where the resale values are good. It means you systematically pay off the two SUVs that transport you and your spouse to white collar jobs. And you postpone "starting a family" until you're completely settled, financially stable and feel ready to cash in the carefree life for kids.
Now don't mistake me... I'm all for being responsible. I've worked hard for 14 years to instill core values into my children that will give them a foundation for wise decision-making. But I'd have to say I'm a proponent for responsible preparation rather than planning. While that may seem very much like splitting hairs, there is a huge difference. Especially when it comes to fertility.
Married at 20, I gave birth to my first child just a week before my 21st birthday. While most eventually celebrated the pregnancy with us, that quick conception was our introduction into the world of naysayers. We almost instantly learned it wasn't "wise" to just let things happen. A little slow in catching on, we were prepared the next time! Soon after our son was born we responsibly got some tiny little pills that, if taken correctly, would prevent a repeat of our first senseless mistake.

Our first three boys when they were 7, 6 and 4 Those little pills were a big fail and within 5 months I was expecting. This time there were two sacs, though one stopped developing fairly early and few people knew. It little mattered that we had heeded all that advice and done our part to resist growing our family... the news of even one was not generally well received. Not willing to be played the fool a third time, we re-strategized and settled on the depo-provera shot as our weapon of choice. Certain we were now bullet-proof, we settled comfortably into life with our sweet little boys. For about a year, that is, until a missed cycle and an overpriced plastic stick confirmed we had again put far too much faith in our plan!
The voices of protest were silent that time, as the pregnancy ended in miscarriage before we'd been brave enough to announce our news. I was beginning to have serious doubts about the wisdom behind our planning. Our best efforts weren't keeping me from getting pregnant, and worse, we'd now lost two babies. I had a sneaking suspicion that chemical prevention methods had a hand in those misfortunes. So we turned to non-chemical options with similar results... and our family grew by three in the following 4 years.

Sweet Hannah, child #4, at age 3! Our fifth child was also from what began as a twin pregnancy. Feeling mildly panicked because I'd now conceived multiples twice, my then-husband scheduled an appointment for a vasectomy. The surgery took place just 6 weeks before our daughter was born and I honestly hadn't protested. I was exhausted, not only from five successive pregnancies and seemingly perpetual nursing, but from the rash of unkind remarks and jokes at our expense.
Would it surprise you at all to learn that even post-vas I conceived? It certainly shocked us, though all three times ended in loss! Some people require only a gentle nudge to catch on, while others need to be body-slammed. Apparently we were numbered among the latter! I'm happy to say that at some point I did finally realize God wasn't terribly in love with all my planning. And that I am totally in love with every single one of my children! Even the ones I didn't think I wanted! He was teaching me to simply open my heart to His plan and embrace the beautiful little people He'd loaned me. And that simple exercise has been a wonderful preparation in accepting His will in every other area of my life!
{In a difficult turn of events, my first marriage ended. I remarried and promptly conceived twin boys, who turned one in June. The voices of my past still make me tremble, so if I bravely whisper an announcement one of these days, just know it has been a life-long battle to surrender control of my plan to His will!}
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Kasey is the cherished wife of Robbie and the mother to seven children: Micah, Nikolas, Alexander, Hannah, Abigail, Levi, and Quinn. The grace of God carries her from one chapter of life to the next, and His faithfulness through homeschooling, motherhood, and homemaking, is often the subject of her writing at Walking Redeemed.

In August 1987, I lay in the recovery room fighting back tears. The anesthetic did little to dull the pain inflicted by the doctor's words. "Your left ovary was removed because of the large cyst. This decreases your chances of getting pregnant by 50%." This news was bad enough. But when I asked about the baby, he told me that a D and C had been performed prior to the discovery of the cyst. My baby had been aborted.

Because I had no medical insurance, there had been no ultrasound. The diagnosis of ectopic pregnancy the day before had been determined by the symptoms I was experiencing: a positive pregnancy test and severe pain in my lower left abdomen resulted in the death of a precious child.

I had never really wanted children. Growing up, I viewed them as bothersome and a hindrance to my independence and dreams of becoming a world renowned writer. Those who knew our family would say, "Tami (my younger sister) will probably have eight or nine. Cheryl might have one." My plans were thwarted however, when I discovered I was pregnant a few days after my 19th birthday. Believing I was doing the right thing, I married my baby's father. This stormy marriage lasted three years.

Terry and I met at the pizza place where I worked when he became the manager in 1986. He quickly became my best friend and a physical relationship followed. We married in December, a few months after the death of our unborn child. My 3-year-old daughter, Amanda was our flower girl. Six weeks later I presented my husband with a gift wrapped in Valentine's Day paper: a baby rattle. Our daughter Stephanie was born in October, via cesarean. My first child had been breach and though I wanted to try a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean), my obstetrician said it was too risky.

I was content with two children. Terry however, desired to have a son. Emily was born in April 1992. Following a grueling miscarriage in 1994, I began to consider sterilization. I visited my OB in December for a pre-op check-up and discovered that I was pregnant again. Haley, my fourth child born via cesarean, was taken early because the doctor feared that my scar would rupture if I went into labor. Weighing 4 lbs 3 oz., she was our smallest baby.

My smallest baby and final cesarean, Haley Rose weighing 4 lbs 3 oz.
Deciding that my body had been through enough between the four cesareans, the surgery to remove my ovary and another invasive surgery to remove yet another cyst on my right ovary, I scheduled a sterilization procedure for Terry several different times. He always had a reason for missing those appointments.

In December 1996, two weeks after yet another positive pregnancy test, I discovered that my husband was having an affair. We were headed for a divorce, but the Lord miraculously intervened.

As our Pastor began to counsel us, he asked that we attend a week-long IBLP Basic Seminar. Less than two weeks after accepting Christ as my Lord and Savior, we were sitting in an auditorium learning about seven non-optional Biblical principles that teach how to view life from an eternal perspective. Though this information was foreign to us, when Mr. Gothard suggested we give our fertility to the Lord, Terry and I both felt the Holy Spirit tugging at our hearts. I resisted at first, telling Terry, "We could end up with ten children!" I was facing yet another cesarean in August and wondered how much more my body could endure. By the end of the week however, the Lord had made His request clear to both of us, and we entered into this covenant with Him.

During my first prenatal appointment a few weeks later with an unfamiliar OB, the elderly doctor studied my obstetrical history and gruffly asked, "Why do you keep having cesareans? Is something wrong with you that prevents you from having your babies the normal way?" I was not prepared for his question. "The first was breech and the others were just repeats. I've had four... " He surely must've missed that. "I see. But I still think you should try." That was all that was said and I left there believing this man was a quack and if I listened to him, I would end up dead. After all, my last child had been taken early to prevent rupturing that fragile uterine scar.

Pastor's wife had driven me to my appointment and I discussed this with her on the drive home. She asked, "Have you ever considered it?" Then she patiently listened as I voiced my concerns. Finally she asked if I would be willing to look into it and offered to give me some information from IBLP regarding VBAC.

Terry and I poured over the information and began praying about this possibility. By the time I returned for my next appointment a month later, we were convinced that the Lord was directing our steps and I informed the doctor that we would indeed like to try a VBAC.

A few weeks before my due date, the obstetrician began to question this decision. Apparently he had discussed it with his colleagues and could find no support. They all agreed that it was too risky, considering I'd had four cesareans. Though we signed waivers releasing him, the hospital and staff from any obligation, he continued to pressure us into changing our minds. He told me that no one in Indiana had successfully delivered vaginally after four cesareans. His wording was meant to strike fear in me, but only instilled a sense of determination instead. I was looking forward to what the Lord was about to do in this situation.

I was given several stipulations regarding the birth. I would not be allowed to go even a few days past my due date. I would only be allowed so much time for each stage of labor. I would be monitored constantly during labor. Two days before my due date, I drank Castor Oil hoping to initiate labor. It didn't work and I only ended up with a severe case of diarrhea.

On August 7, 1997, my due date, I awoke with consistent contractions. My appointment was scheduled for that morning,. Terry and I were eager to see how I was progressing, but as the doctor examined me, he gruffly said, "You aren't in labor. You wouldn't even know what labor feels like!" I knew he was right about that as I'd been to the hospital twice the week before and was embarrassed that I didn't know the difference between false labor and the real thing. "You just need to have a cesarean. I can do it this afternoon... " He suggested. I was having a weak moment and looked at Terry. He shook his head. We drove home in silence as the "false labor" continued.

By four o'clock the pain had intensified and I began to blame the Castor Oil. I phoned the doctor's office when I began leaking liquid, but he refused to talk to me. He told the nurse to tell me it was caused from the examination and that he could still do the cesarean that evening. I thanked her and hung up.

The pain only increased. As I held a hot heating pad on my abdomen, I thought if I could just have one for my back, I would feel so much better. Terry became so concerned that he finally phoned the doctor at 8:00 P.M. then called Pastor and asked him to come get the children so he could take me to the hospital.

When we arrived, I wouldn't let Terry take in my bag or camera because I believed I only needed pain medication and I would be going home. I didn't even wear shoes. As we stepped off the elevator, the OB nurse met us and began asking questions. I quickly explained that I was not in labor and only needed pain medication. She informed me that she had been instructed to prep me for a cesarean. I firmly said, "I refuse to sign any papers. I only need pain medicine." She then told me that she couldn't prescribe anything until I had been examined.

The pain seemed almost constant. As the nurse began the examination she asked why I thought I wasn't in labor. "Because I saw the doctor this morning and talked to his nurse earlier and he said I wasn't!" The nurse smiled and said, "Honey, you're at eight centimeters; you're about to have a baby!"

An epidural was quickly ordered in hopes of buying the necessary time for the doctor to arrive. As he raced into the room, he began to prepare me for a forceps delivery. Terry told him he wouldn't allow that instrument to be used on his baby. As the two men argued, I looked at the nurse and pleaded, "Four times I've laid on a table and had my babies cut out of me. I want to push this one into the world." She grabbed my leg and whispered, "With the next contraction, PUSH!" I followed her instructions, then she said, "Excuse me, Doctor, did you want to catch this child?" I heard the clang of metal as the forceps hit the floor. Mackenzie was born after only two strong pushes.

Our sixth child, Corrie Beth was born in another hospital with a Certified Nurse Midwife in 1999. She weighed 10 lbs 3 oz. Deciding that I didn’t enjoy the hospital experience, we planned to have our next baby at a birthing center. Isaac (our “long-awaited-for son”) was born in January 2001. He weighed 10 lbs 12 oz. Two years later his brother was born at the same facility. Eric Samuel (“Sam”) weighed 10 lbs 4 oz.

When I became pregnant with our ninth child, I was walking through the house one day and a thought came to my mind that this baby would be born at home. It wasn’t a decision, really; but rather a realization. I discussed this with Terry and he agreed. Later we discovered that the birthing center where the boys had been born was no longer allowing VBACs. This was a confirmation to us.

Two months before the baby was due, my midwife requested I get an ultrasound to rule out twins. The female obstetrician read my obstetrical history in disbelief. “Obviously, Someone... " She pointed and looked up,"... meant for you to have this many children.“ Though she agreed to be my back-up doctor in case of complications, she informed me that a trip to the hospital during labor would end in a definite cesarean. “Off the record,” she said, “You really are better off doing this at home.” Another confirmation.

After a long, but peaceful labor, Destiny Faith was born at home, weighing 11 lbs 15 oz; my biggest baby! I experienced shoulder dystocia during the delivery, as the baby came down with a hand on her head, but my competent Certified Professional Midwife knew how to handle the situation and the baby and I were both fine.

My biggest baby: Destiny Faith born at home weighing 11 lbs 15 oz.
The year after Destiny was born, Amanda married a young man named Ryan. In September, we all rejoiced as she announced that she was expecting a baby. I took a pregnancy test the next day and discovered that we were due a week apart. We were pregnant together for several weeks, then I miscarried our baby in mid-October.

A little over a year after Aiden was born, Amanda was pregnant again. By this time I was 44 years old and had begun to think that we were done having babies ourselves. It was time to settle into my role as Grandma. I was a little sad, but content.

Right before Christmas I began experiencing stomach flu-like symptoms. I complained to Amanda, “Great! Everyone is going to be sick at Christmas.” She asked how long I’d had the nausea then gave her diagnosis; “Mom, you’re not sick; you’re pregnant!” I dismissed the thought but then asked Terry to pick up a test a few days later, “Just to rule out the possibility”. It was positive!

I visited my midwife’s back-up obstetrician, but he refused to be associated with this birth. He said he was glad that I’d had successful VBACs, but he believed that what I was doing was dangerous. To us, his assessment was simply a testament of what the Lord had done. Though some family members and friends expressed concern for my well-being, I was not afraid, “... For I know Whom I have believed, and am persuaded that He is able to keep that which I have committed unto Him against that day.” I truly believe He healed that cesarean scar when we made that covenant with Him in 1997.

On August 25, 2009 after a 28-hour labor, our third son was born at home as his three older sisters watched, sobbing and in awe. He too had his arm up, so I once again experienced shoulder dystocia. He was also posterior, which made the delivery more painful and the cord was wrapped around his neck. Thank God for my wonderful midwife! Michael Ray weighed 11 lbs 2 oz and was 23” long. His three-month-old niece and two year old nephew were introduced to him within minutes of his birth, as were his other four sisters and 2 big brothers. We praise the Lord for one more opportunity to raise yet another Kingdom Warrior.

I’ve been asked if I would ever counsel another woman facing her fifth cesarean to refuse the surgery and give birth at home. Don’t simply follow my footsteps, I say; but follow after the Lord.
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Cheryl Long is an unashamed follower of Jesus Christ, wife to Terry for 24 years, mom to ten children (several of which are adults already!), grandma to two precious grandbabies so far, and an occasional blogger at Tresures from a Shoebox where her desire is to give hope to those who are hurting, to exhort and encourage women in their high calling as wife and mother, and to bring glory to her Savior.