As a second-generation homeschooler at the beginning of our own journey and participants in coordinating our provincial homeschool convention, I sometimes get asked what it was like to be homeschooled and what things those new to the circuit can expect. Condensed, here are five expectations I have as we jump into the journey with both feet this Fall.
#1. Expect to make sacrifices. Money, time, your own interests - homeschooling requires a lifestyle of servitude in order to work.
Those extra dollars your husband has worked hard for may go towards curriculum before new outfit or a kitchen remodel.
The house you took so much pride in keeping clean and organized as a new wife may harbor cobwebs in corners and dust on the shelves because you're busy with read-alouds during the day and marking assignments at night.
When your girl friends want to snag you away for a morning coffee, you may have to decline because there are swimming lessons to attend and frogs to dissect.
The diploma you invested thousands of dollars in and worked 4 long years for may not bring an income while you voluntarily assume the role of wife, mother, teacher, guidance counselor, cafeteria lady, and on-site nurse at home instead.
When you spread yourself too thin, burn the candle from both ends, and collapse into your husband's arms one day crying, "I just can't do this anymore!", may you "come boldly unto the throne of grace, that you may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrew 4 :16)"
#2. Expect to be sanctified. If the saying "familiarity breeds contempt" is true, homeschooling will provide you with countless opportunities to be sanctified and conformed to God's image.
You will be exposed to a disgusting amount of sin in your children and yourself. Tempers will flare, bad attitudes will develop, and misunderstandings will take place.
There will be no third party available to disciple your child in the heat of the moment. When a crisis happens (milk spilled on the carpet for the second time in an hour, or highschooler who believes you're the meanest mom in the world for making her stay home and finish her algebra before she's allowed to play volleyball with her friends), it'll be your responsibility to "train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it. (Proverbs 22:6)"
You can't escape the sin in your family when you live with each other all day, every day. This is a blessing as much as it is a curse. You can deal with it immediately and offer your child the glorious redemption and forgiveness to be found in Jesus Christ, or you can let it fester and reap the consequences.
#3. Expect to be challenged. If you're looking for a challenge greater than one you will ever find in university or a prestigious career, try homeschooling on for a size.
If impressing upon your children the necessity of their salvation, choosing curriculum that caters to the individual needs of each of your children, teaching multiple grade levels simultaneously, fitting in trips to the museum, soccer field, factories, music practice, the dentist and library, managing your home, and romancing your husband isn't difficult, nothing is.
Homeschooling is no easy task. In fact, it's probably the most difficult, yet most rewarding thing you will ever do.
#4. Expect to be misunderstood. If someone has never "caught the vision," sends their child to school, or homeschools for a different reason than you, you may have your motives judged, your children introspected, and your feelings hurt.
It's unfortunate, but even Christians can dislike the use of Scripture to explain your decision to homeschool. They may deem homeschooling as "just" another educational option and feel convicted or take offense when you homeschool because of principles you believe to be biblical.
However well-meaning you may be in your attempt to encourage fellow homeschooling parents, referring to homeschooling as your "God-given task," may not bode well with those using the school method. They may feel like they're being judged even though your comments aren't directed to them.
The sad reality is that the hardest part of homeschooling is not the teaching as much as it is defending the cause to those who want your ship to crash and burn simply because it is different.
#5. Expect it to be worth it.
How much would you give...
... to be there when your child stammers her way through her very first sentence?
... to witness the light go on when your son "gets" a concept you've been struggling to teach for weeks?
... to take a day off in the middle of the week and go tobogganing with friends?
... to make birthdays holidays?
... to watch your 13-year-old son tie his 6-year-old sister's shoe laces because he doesn't know that it's not "cool"?
... to count watching Grandpa's pigs be born as Science and hearing stories from World War II veterans in the nursing home as History?
... to stay up late, finding constellations in a starry sky, not worrying about what time they go to bed because they can sleep in the next morning?
... to let the kids run around the house 20 times to get their wiggles out before sitting down and trying again?
... to let your son stand up to do his math because he can think better when he's beside is chair instead of on it?
... to hear, "Just one more chapter! Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease, Mom?"
... to find a hand-written note under your pillow that reads, "I'm sorry for disobeying you today and not doing my Spelling. I'll try to be super good tomorrow and get all my questions right. Then are we allowed to go to the park? xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo"?
... to be taught something new again by a child who would have been labeled anywhere else?
... to be able to cry with a fellow homeschooler because she's going through it too?
... to be embraced by your husband and hear him whisper in your ear, "I'm taking you away for the weekend! Your Mom is coming to stay with the kids."?
... to know Who gave you that extra measure of grace when you couldn't take one more day?
Homeschooling is a heroic endeavor, full of ups and downs, challenges and opportunities, joys and sorrows that will push you beyond your limits to Someone greater than yourself with a storehouse of grace much larger than you can imagine.
It'll humble, stretch, and strengthen you. It'll keep you on your toes when you're not on your knees.
It's not for the faint of heart. It's not for quitters. It's not for anyone who thinks they can do it on their own.
Homeschooling is for fathers and mothers who want to be there to disciple their children as they walk by the way, as the lay down, and as they rise up (Deut. 6:7).
Homeschooling is for fathers and mothers who believe that no one else in the world understands, loves, and recognizes the strengths and weaknesses in their children as much as they do.
Homeschooling is for parents who want to provide their child with a living education that reaches far beyond the confines of four walls and a desk.
Homeschooling is for Moms and Dads who need Jesus, because it won't work without Him.
Looking for more practical homeschool encouragement? Our new eBook, Homeschooling Day by Day is available for $2.00 until January 17! It's 40 chapters of realism, practical advice, and plenty of grace from homeschooling Moms on every stage of the journey. You can read the Table of Contents here.
Homeschooling Day By Day: $2.00 40 Chapters (with Discussion Questions)
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Linking to: Raising Homemakers, Deep Roots At Home, Raising Arrows, Time Warp Wife, Far Above Rubies, A Wise Woman., Hip Homeschool Moms, Living and Learning at Home, Walking Redeemed, The Better Mom, The Modest Mom