There have been days where our house looked like World War III. Days where fancy-footwork is required to dodge the kid paraphernalia strewn across the floor. Days when, after nearly spraining my ankle for the umpteenth time on dinky cars and mega blocks, I ask my 3-year-old to start picking up the mess. She looks at me and innocently asks, "What mess?" and I bury my head in my hands and weep.
How important is it to teach our children to clean up after themselves? I've often questioned whether cleanliness is a matter of character or part of our individual DNA, whether it should be enforced and to what extent.
See, we have both extremes within our family. Our daughter is naturally... "laid back," a nice way of saying she couldn't find the mess if a tornado tore through her room (which it does on occasion). Our son, although he's just 21-months-old, is a lover of order. He'll automatically line up his shoes in the closet when he comes in from outside; his sippy cup gets placed back on the counter when he's done taking a drink.
When it's time to clean up toys before bed, one inspects every toy as if seeing it for the first time before s-l-o-w-l-y placing it in the bin; the other hustles as if cleaning up were some sort of strong-man competition. One wouldn't give two hoots about leaving her undies sunny-side-up in the middle of the bedroom floor; the other makes a bee-line for the laundry hamper when he finds a dirty article of clothing. One is messy, the other is neat and I'm trying to find the balance.
One theory says cleanliness is next to godliness. The other says cleaning up toys while the children are growing is like shoveling snow while the snow is still snowing. One thing is for certain - the state of our home is never more important then the state of their souls and while a mess can remain unchanged for as long as you leave it there, our children are daily developing and strengthening habits that will effect them for the rest of their lives.
Besides the fact that keeping things in their proper places typically results in a calm, peaceful atmosphere with less stress, hurry, and bustle, tidiness is a trait I want to teach my children as part of an effort to care for their souls. Picking up after themselves is important for 3 reasons (at least):
1. It pleases the Lord. Creation testifies to the orderliness of God's character. Likewise, we also ought to delight in the practice of attending to our duties with watchfulness and care.
Additionally, it is pleasing to the Lord when we are faithful in the little things. Teaching our children to take charge over the ordinary duties of life is helping to lay the groundwork for greater responsibilities. Conscious attention and a cheerful attitude towards "trivial" tasks builds the character required to acceptably serve the Lord in whatever situation we find ourselves in.
2. It honors Mommy and Daddy. It's not a matter of "Because I said so"; it's a matter of, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." (Ephesians 6:1) I shouldn't need to present a logical case to my children on why they must clean up the toys when I ask them to. However important things like safety, making our home look suitable for company, and house rules may be, their responsiveness to my request reflects the attitude of their heart. An obedient heart and a willing spirit bring joy to Mommy and glory to God.
3. It prepares for future usefulness. Some women will accomplish twice as much as others in a lifetime simply because as a child, they learned the importance of keeping everything in its proper place. Their homes appear orderly and little effort is required to keep it that way.
Other women will find themselves despairing in the midst of confusion that reigns over their homes. Throughout life, they will feel hurried and rushed, rarely able to enjoy a moment's peace. It will seem like they are forever trying to put things away but nothing stays that way for long.
Many times I wonder "What's the point? They don't remember!" when I find clothes strewn across the floor, shoes forgotten to be lined up in the closet, books left lying everywhere around our living room except the bookshelf. But I've heard from older and much wiser mothers that consistency is key. Diligently working to teach them the habit of tidiness by many words of encouragement and my own example will prepare them for life of usefulness, purposefulness, and, in the case of the girls, an apt and capable housewife.
And so, I will continue to hand them a wet rag while I clean the floor even if they spread the dirt around more than they clean it up. I'll pass them a dust rag on housework day even if I need to go over the same spot when they're not looking. I'll let them return the toys to the bucket they turned over even if it's quicker when I do it myself. I'll let them help fold laundry even if the stack of washcloths in the linen closet looks precarious and uneven. I'll do it because I want to raise our children to live a life that's pleasing to the Lord, honoring to Mommy and Daddy, and prepared for future usefulness.
Linking to: Homestead Revival, Raising Homemakers, Deep Roots At Home, A Mama's Story, Time-Warp Wife, Far Above Rubies, Raising Arrows, The Modest Mom