"Aren't you supposed to be in school?" the cashier asked our 4 year-old daughter.
"My Mommy teaches me at home!" she replied excitedly. "Today I learned how to make '9.' You just go: 'Make a loop and then a line, this is how to make a nine!'"
"We homeschool them," I confirmed.
"Wow! So, you're a teacher?" she asked.
"Yes, I just don't have a degree," I laughed.
"You're allowed to do that?! I couldn't imagine being home with my kids all day. I need my break!" On a different topic, she turned to the kids and asked, "So are you guys all ready for Halloween?"
They gave her a blank stare.
"Sorry," I explained, "they don't know what Halloween is yet."
The poor cashier looked bewildered by us weird, sheltered homeschoolers.
Weird, as in, "not normal."
"Not normal," as in, we go shopping in the middle of the day with the whole family while everyone else is in school.
"Not normal," as in, I am their teacher and I don't even have a degree. Weirder still, it's perfectly legal and statistically better for children academically.
"Sheltered," as in, even though she's perfectly capable of politely and confidently articulating why she's not in school to a perfect stranger, our 4-year-old has no concept of Halloween and we don't plan on "enlightening" her any earlier than necessary.
It's a valid point, people ignorant or unfavorable to homeschooling make. We aren't normal and we do shelter our children.
I didn't know what the "f" word was until I was seventeen, and only then because I saw the letter in brackets on the front of a tabloid at a check-out and asked about it. I didn't know what "initiation" or "penny-pushing" was until our neighbor boy recalled his first day of public high school. I didn't know what "swirlies" or "nature wedgies" were until last week.
I suppose that makes me naive. But I wonder, of what redeeming value is there in exposing children to things that dishonor the Lord? Don't tell me it helps them prepare for the "the real world." In the world, you get fired or serve time for stuffing someone inside their locker or making them push pennies down the hallway with their nose.
I'm not suggesting hiding in a cave somewhere and excusing ourselves from ever having to face anyone but our family. I'm questioning the idea of subjecting our young children to all manner of evil so they can fit society's definition of "normal," instead of naive; "acceptable," instead of awkward; "welcomed," instead of weird.
It doesn't worry me if our kids can get away with wearing second-hand clothes, have never read Heather Has Two Mommies, aren't getting "sex" ed in Kindergarten, don't know what swear words are, have never played a video game, or stare blankly when someone asks them about Halloween.
Harvey Bluedorn in his excellent book, Teaching the Trivium (affiliate link), responds to the "real world" objection with:
"Adults need to learn to live righteously in the real world. Children do not have the maturity to properly respond to sophisticated cultural pressures. It is the job of the parents to instruct them and to test them in controlled situations, not simply sprinkle them with a few choice words of advice, then immerse them in an adverse world. If we taught swimming this way, most students would drown." Chapter 3, pg. 67
Naive? Possibly.
Sheltered? Definitely.
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